I’m loving social media posts from people who are finally coming to the realisation that once you are really happy in your own skin and don’t really give a shit about what other people say, then you can really rock your own world one day at a time.
Society’s description of “perfection” does not have to define you. I noticed the other day a Facebook post from Gaetano, a local designer at Gaetano Couture who quoted a description from Google about what a “runway model” should look like. As a fashion designer and a couturier for women of all shapes and sizes, he honestly commented his opinion about how ridiculous these measurement specifications are when in general most of designer’s clients are either petite, or large size women! Are we really always going to have 6 foot 4 women modeling designer clothes on our fashion runways? We will have to wait and see!
And it really made me smile. People across the planet are really waking up and are taking the power in their own hands, in more ways than one.
A huge percentage of us humans, both men and women, have extreme insecurities. We think that we have to reach perfection, otherwise we’re repulsive. We look at other people and wonder why we can’t be as pretty or stylish as them, when yet, there’s another insecure man or woman asking the same about you! So many women out there think that they look like crap without make up or if their hair is not blow dried to perfection. I hear you.. but you have to learn to “own yourself” especially when you look awful.
Let me tell you something. If you are impressed and confident with yourself, soon, others will be impressed with you too. All it takes is some more self love and not giving two hoots about what this one and that one is saying. Form your own reality and opinions and then you’ll find yourself being crowded by loving people and people who are not wasting all their energy gossiping or minding other people’s business! Alleluia! But, If you want to love someone, you need to learn to love yourself first.
And Pride in yourself is not the cure to self sabotage either or thinking I accept that I’m not good enough. Oh no, Pride and “owning it” is not running from your mistakes, but accepting them for what they are, and working with them from there to be a better person.
I can recognize my faults. I can list every mistake I have made in my life. I can torment myself constantly by visualizing the errors I have committed. But to accept is dynamic. Acceptance is kneeling before my own faults and bearing the consequences of their actions. Only then can I truly stand on my own two feet firmly.
How To Own It; Few Things That Work For Me – Try Them Too
Owning your power gives you the energy and the strength to be successful. Colleagues and key persons will perceive you as influential and effective and seek your opinion and assistance. Owning your power leads to increased confidence and an understanding of how you can help others make decisions and achieve their objectives. Feeling empowered allows you to create and maintain strong relationships both in and out of the workplace. It allows you to stand up for yourself, negotiate for yourself, demonstrate your strength while admitting when you’re wrong. It takes power and credibility to allow yourself to be vulnerable and compassionate without losing yourself in the process.
The great news is that we ALL have POWER to OWN IT. The trick is to connect with it and take it ON.
Here are a few things you can do every week to keep your “OWN IT” work on track
Look in a mirror EVERYDAY, and even if you don’t believe it, look in your eyes, and say aloud, “I’m beautiful, I’m amazing, I’m doing a great job.” Telling yourself positive things will bring out the good in you. Even if you have a hard time believing it, when you hear it so much, you have no choice BUT to start believing it. It will start to sink in slowly.
Find Your Own Personal Style
Don’t copy someone else’s style by the book. You can look for fashion advice in a magazine or a blog but then do adapt it to your personality, skin colour, your mood of the day! You need to dress to impress YOURSELF. Not others find your own style and love it. Plus, realize you can’t be a walking Barbie doll-like those models are. Those are almost too perfect!
Acknowledge and Declare Your Goals .
Some people often have a negative opinion about the words ambition and success. They want to be successful but feel awkward admitting it and letting others know they are committed to their career. Let your manager know your career aspirations, and seek out mentors and sponsors who can help you reach your goal. When you hesitate to declare your ambition, it keeps you small and robs you of your power. Never be afraid to acknowledge your Goals!
Replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations.
80% of things we fear never happen. Our ego is so strong but many a time, it doesn’t serve us when we are trying to challenge ourselves. Nothing can sabotage you more than letting negative self-talk dominate your thoughts. Negative self-talk blocks you and paralyzes you from taking action, holds you back from sharing your thoughts and ideas, and prevents you from taking risks and exploring new opportunities. These thoughts will literally empty your fuel tank, and once you’re out of gas, you no longer have power. Talk more positive things.
Maintain a growth mindset.
Knowledge is power and those with a growth mindsetare open to learning. Be curious. Keep an open mind. Listen and learn from others. Every day provides a new opportunity for personal growth. You can’t be an expert in everything, but when you have a growth mindset your willingness to learn leads to personal growth and power. I love to be surrounded by people who are in this mindset all the time.
Practice self-care and Me Time
Last but not least, as a life-long goal driven, multi-tasking energetic achiever, it has taken me a while to learn how powerful and crucial self-car is to keeping a balance in life. If you don’t take the time to re-fuel and re-energize, you will find yourself either burnt out or low on the good vibes! That renewed energy comes from self-care. Only you know how to best replenish your body and soul. For some it’s meditation or yoga. Maybe it’s a trip to the spa or an exercise routine. For some it’s a walk by the sea or with their dog. Whatever you choose, make sure to choose it and schedule it. This is the only way to maintain your personal power over time.
Owning our individual needs, desires, skills and even insecurities allows us to see the value of setting intentions for ourselves and our actions, and working toward a sense of integrated self-definition and an authentic sense of security in our work and in our lives.